Lowering the Ante on Christmas

There has been much and more commentary on President Biden's latest celebration of Christmas. Indignant critics lambast the executive for the celebration's indecorum and disconnection with the actual "reason for the season," but these are stylistic differences. Libertarians look on and wonder... how did we ever get into this game of commodifying the executive's celebration of Christmas?!

There are accounts of carollers stopping at the White House dating back to the nineteenth century. The carollers would sing for the president, who would receive them at the door, affording a very limited glimpse into the White House. President Franklin Roosevelt, master of optics as he was, received one such group of carollers in the White House to be photographed with them, and publicized the otherwise private yuletide celebrations. Since then, every administration has showcased the White House's internal celebrations with increasing production value. During their time at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, Bill and Hillary Clinton had their childhood homes depicted in gingerbread by renowned pastry chef Roland Mesnier, who years later died from natural causes... allegedly.

Since around Bush II, the White House’s publicized celebrations took on the caliber of Hallmark commercials, curated and scripted down to the minutest detail. It was only a matter of time before they’d be choreographed. Bush III’s White House will undoubtedly feature a holographic Santa Claus slave-driving reindeer ‘cross the sky as he redistributes gifts to undertaxed tots.

Personally I’m looking forwards to Mike ter Maat’s Libertarian administration. There’ll be a quiet year-end party for executive staff, with a bowl of thinly spiked egg nog and President ter Maat handing out bonuses in the form of $25 Amazon gift cards.

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